8/30: Today is Friday

PicsArt_04-08-10.45.46

Today is Friday and I’m feeling kind of defeated

I missed the mark with something and

I’m hoping it was just a momentary lapse in judgement on my part

I’m hoping it was just a miscalculated step in my plans

I’m hoping I can decipher and discern

What failure tastes like so I can learn how to best avoid this misstep in the future

 

I hope Continue reading

1/30: Waves (NPM)

This transition is hard.

I saw it coming but there

Is no way to completely prepare for the waves

That are heading in my direction.

No matter how crafty

My attempts are to secure

My position, it will not be enough to

Prepare me. Either way

I will be moved. Continue reading

4/1: A Sonnet for Fools

There are only twenty four hours in

the day, yet you spend your time perfecting

the art of foolery by selecting

denial over truth. You are far more in

tune with a man who sleeps and wears thin

his opportunities while respecting

the false comforts of pride. It’s affecting

your steps and hindering your growth. Where in

your heart must I search to find the pieces

of your senses that you willfully have

decommissioned from your thoughts? What ceases

to fit has either grown or shriveled. Have

you not noticed the collapse of your heart

…the way it…fails to properly supply demands?

7/30: Expensive – NaPoWriMo

Expensive

 

You’re so expensive

And emotionally taxing

 

I find myself stuck trying to solve the riddle that is you

I’m trying to rearrange

The pieces and either way

I always end up with other valuable pieces missing

 

I have holes

Where hope should be

 

I have holes where

Faith should be

 

And I unknowingly

Traded them in

For the insufficient substitute

That is you

 

I was foolish

To believe that you were a compliment

To my desires and

The fulfillment of my hope

 

I’m bankrupt because

I have been giving you

Time that does not belong to me

 

Now I’m in debt

And I’m praying for a way out

Because I’m finally fed up

I’ve vacated the position

Of being complacent

You are not something

I want to just deal with

 

Even if I have to consolidate

My emotions to fix my broke resolve

I will start from scratch

And rebuild my foundation

Because I need to move past this

Past you

Past corrupt tendencies

That leave me in positions of hopelessness

 

You are expensive

I can’t afford you

I can’t afford what you do to my heart

The state of my emotions

Is in disarray

And I no longer want

To be in this position

Where I’m unkempt

 

This is not love

This is not what love feels like

This is not what love looks like

 

This is what lust is

This is what lust does to feelings

This is what lust does to appearances

 

Love gives the advantage whereas

Lust takes advantage and

I have no more advantages

Left to give

Other than the one I reserved

For myself where

I finally decide to walk away

 

4/30: Clear Vision – NaPoWriMo

Clear Vision:

 

I don’t want to let you go

I die a little inside at the thought

And its probably not safe

To become so attached

To something that can become

So easily detached

 

I’ve developed a severe

Case of vertigo because

I’m been running from

one end of extremes

To the next

 

But where do I go from here

I’m surrounded by dead ends

Because these thoughts led

Me into the worse possible places

And I’m tired of digging a deeper hole for myself

And…And…

And you’re gone

And its surreal

And I’m so used

To the irrelevances that left me blind

That I’m at a lost as to what I should do

Now that I can see clearly

Because I hate what I see