1/30: Waves (NPM)

This transition is hard.

I saw it coming but there

Is no way to completely prepare for the waves

That are heading in my direction.

No matter how crafty

My attempts are to secure

My position, it will not be enough to

Prepare me. Either way

I will be moved.

 

I will have to go through the motions

And deal with the losses and gains

That follow the end of an episodic tradition

 

I am being snatched away from my zone of comfort

And a part of me is excited

A part of me is looking forward to this unknown thrill

Where I will be thrown into unfamiliar territory.

 

Yet and still…a part of me aches

For what I will leave behind

Because I’ve grown roots here.

They’re not strong enough to keep me

Grounded though, not anymore

Not against these waves.

 

These waves…these changes…they have no mercy.

They’re the frenemy I love when they come on my preferred time

But when they come close enough to actually touch me,

It feels like an invasion almost.

It feels like a loss of control.

It feels like I’m just a passenger with this seatbelt called trust that barely works

Because all I can do is just hold on

And even that appears to be difficult at times.

 

Hear my clearly though because I can’t let my confession

Take away from the other side of my truth.

 

I can’t start a new journey

If I’m still stirring around in the old one and sometimes I know I can drag my feet.

Maybe that’s why I get a little push from here and there.

He knows I’m a little slow at getting through it all therefore

He gives me a nudge

I can admit that my comfort zone can be addictive

It can be so addictive that it infects me and therein effects the execution of my dreams

 

It’s the addiction I love and the same one I hate.

Deep down I know I can’t stay here.

Deep down I know I lack the ability to break away.

So I feel like I just cancelled myself out

 

However, thank God

He has never counted me out.

He tears me away by any means necessary

As He desires to get me to a better place.

And yes the waves hurt but only for a little while.

 

The discomfort that comes in tandem with shifting

Is nothing compared to the blessings that come with Grace and obedience

 


 

Lyrical Tempest

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